So I'll be delivering the baby in a General Hospital 5 mins from home. And since in the UK we only get to scan twice throughout our whole pregnancy, my last scan was 2 weeks ago. At week 20th to be precise.
Ghee.. I wish I can tell you a lot on how is it to be experiencing pregnancy in the UK but I just don't have anything. It's so relax here. And never once I got to see a doctor. All the time was only the midwife which in Malay we call mak bidan.
But to be honest the midwives here is way way qualified. Qualified to an extend if we don't have any complication, we will only see them. They are like a pregnancy doctor. They are the one who take care of you. Come to your house to see if you're okay. Check the baby even after it is delivered. Basically they'll be your friend and you can call them anytime if you have something to ask about. Some of them are even the same age as you are. The interns. So no doctor or gynea or obgyn, whatever you guys call them.
Did I say time flies fast? Oh I did, did I? Now where's the time machine when I needed one the most. I'm running out of air thinking about this PhD thingy. I do hope that Allah help me get through this smoothly. Insya'Allah. The lil guy hasn't even pop out yet I'm already panting and sweating. How all you moms out there juggling between a PhD and a family and a career and a hobby is something that I'm forever amazed. *take a bow.
Oh well, I have a lot to prepare. A lot to think. A lot to adjust. A lot to settle. A lot to discuss. And a lot to SPEND.
I think I'll just go and bury my head in the pillow now.
21 comments:
InsyaAllah the baby will come with rezeki. It's challenging to have a baby & PhD at the same time. But Allah akan ringankan beban u in many different ways. I only hv my baby after I completed my doctorate study, but I know a few Malaysian students who successfully completed their study with flying colouwithhold having babies abroad & furthering their studies. But I'm sure there's a lot of sacrifice & challenges along the way. I just received a good news that a friend of mine in Stockholm just gave birth to a boy & she's in her final yr phd. I know it's easy to say than being done. Goodluck & take care.
InshaAllah u'll go through this.ameen.semoga Allah permudahkan semua perkara baik yang Hana usahakan ;)
Hana, do you happen to know hows the rate for nursery over there? I am thinking to bring my child but of course not in London area, too expensive. But I heard anywhere else is expensive too. I know that 5 years and above would be free. Since you're going to have a baby soon, thought you might know if nursery is one of your option. Thank you : )
assalamualaikum, dik..em ur silent reader n luv reading ur blog...setiap hambaNya melalui fasa yg berbeza dlm kehidupan..be strong, muga berjaya..yh penting sekrang alwaz take care of ur health so baby pun akan sihat dan gembira ye..
Hana, just take it easy ok.. InsyaAllah everything will be fine... I finally completed my PhD degree in what, 7 years time! I spent 4 and half years in the UK (plus one for MSc degree) and 2 and half years here in Malaysia for completing this PhD.. So many things that I've learned through out the journey and yes, one cannot compare one experience to each other as it will be totally different.. While in d UK, my first son was just 1 and a half when I started my PhD journey.. Then, along the way, I was granted rezeki to have another child in the UK.. after delivering, I was diagnosed a PND - post natal depression - effect of having too much thinking about PhD and raising a family... Then, went back to Malaysia, after strongly believed that I couldn't end up with anything if I decided to just stay in the UK. Left hubby as he just started his PhD journey... Register my self in one of the local Uni in continuing my PhD. Got marked and lots of warning letters from sponsors. Missing hubby so much for the long distance relationship... Granted another rezeki for another child in the first year studying here... Alhamdulillah manage to submit the thesis before being terminated by my uni (sponsor).. and syukur, finally the viva went very well although I was having really bad sickness for another rezeki (another child)... :)
It is a really really long journey... the feeling of wanted to give it up, occurs many many times! Earlier, I felt so regret for taking this path whereas I supposed I should just redha and thankful for whatever given to me (shame on me)... I guess this journey thought me really really well to get me close to our Creator, to understand everything happens for reason, to really know the meaning of redha, and syukur for whatever given to us and to understand that although we plan, Allah's plan are THE BEST to us... and along the journey, I always remember, if we feel bad, there are lots of other people are suffering more than us...
InsyaAllah Hana, I am sure you are strong and will overcome all of this in no time. It is TRUE that everything during pregnancy is HORMONAL.. hehehe.. don't get mad... I was mad at that statement before when I was carrying my second child. but, afterall it's true.. take one thing at a time, especially during this pregnancy time. I am sure no one wants to end up with PND (it's not nice afterall!! gosssshh I hate those anti-depressant pill, all I like was looking forward to routine meetings with my counselor).. All the best to you...
xx
ohh.. forgot to mention, hehehhe.. my area of PhD is quite similar to you... :)
u r so funny in this entry. haha. scary kan. hope everything will be ok for u and the incoming baby.
assalam hana. i hope everything is going on well with your pregnancy. this is just a suggestion, since you once mentioned (about a year ago) that you know my best friend in varsity, nadiah in here
http://intelligent-boy-eshan.blogspot.com/2010/08/shes-coming-home.htmlmaybe you can ask her a thing or two on how to cope with pregnancy while doing PhD in Imperial and how she managed to do all that while raising a 2-year old daughter. i think she's finishing by the end of this year inshaAllah. just a thought you know. in case you need help in anything. take care hana =)
Please go and find motivational books for PhD students, re-read self-help books for PhD students, cth mcm the one published by Open University Press. Create positive thinking, I believe it's not about the baby, it's the PhD itself is challenging. Carrying a baby just increase the resistance due to physical constraints. Now, since you are at the peak of the pregnancy, 5-7 months is the best period of pregnancy (especially this is your first baby, hence there is no toddler/other children to drain your energy), so get the most out of it. Don't worry, I am sure you're getting there. On top of this is daily recitation al-Quran. Al-Quran is a miracle which creates positive vibes in you... Do this for at least a week, I am sure you will experience the miracles... Take care... and always be positive. Take care...
Thanks for the tips. I do agree carrying the baby just increase resistance due to physical constraints. On top of other matters like childcare, expenses and whatnot since I only have myself n my husband worries me, if differ if we're in msia where relatives n support are everywhere. But I'm sure we'll think of something. My only fear is a drastic change in my life since I have a history of depression when that happen. But alhamdulillah I've been reciting al-quran everyday since ramadhan, I'm more calmed than ever.
Thanks! yeah I met her once and ask her about it. She said better not to have a child while doing PhD.. Haha the different between me and her is she has a husband who is also doing a PhD hence flexible time. Mine on the other hand is a full time engineer. So that left with nursery while gonna cost almost £1000 permonth. crazy huh?
Oh wow! you're experience is even tougher than mine. Alhamdulillah and congrats with the PhD. You're inspiring! Expect me to bother u when I need some lift me up... and plus!! I can ask u question related to signal right? hehehehe
Thanks! :)
Oh thank u thank u. I needed a prayer like this.
Yeah! Challenges are a gift from Allah. We must welcome them with open arm. One day we'll thank Allah for giving us the opportunity to improve ourself along the way.
I think the rate would be a standard rate of £50-£60 per day. You do the math.
wow! £1000 per month. that is crazy. it's a good thing your husband is working though. anyhow, i think you'll manage. and just like her, i sense that you're going to be a good mom and your boy is going to be pretty smart too =)
no problem... i'll be happy to help... after submitting my thesis and thinking of what i've been going through, i feel like i really want to give motivation to other people.. hehehe.. tatau lah org buleh ikut atau x.. but i really want to share with others that insyaAllah, one day, there will be light at the end of the tunnel, that panic is good, but not to over panic until u get nervous breakdown, that just believe that if it is our rezeki, it will be ours when Allah granted so, that we must take one thing at a time when the situation seems uncertain, difficult and dark... hehehehe... nway, anuff babbling.. just email me if you need anything k? take care hana!
Salam Hana,
You'll get through all the obstacles or so called panting/sweating easily later on! You'll adapt definitely. Insya Allah. Good luck with your pregnancy and most important delivery time. Your auntie kecik will get a nenek title next year! Hehe... may Allah SW bless you dear!
you will get through it all and not just that when you have your little boy in your arms you will forget all the things you had to go through as he will be your only focus. The baby will make a big change in your lifestyle but in the long run it will be a good one just support each other and embrace the new way of life. Allah swt will guide you and make it easy for you, you are very blessed.
Salam Hana,
InsyaAllah, you'll get through this easily. Just be focused and consistent with your PhD work and when the little one is arrive, you'll definitely know how to adjust yourself between work (PhD) and family (especially the new born). Myself had go through this phase before. I'd my second child during my first year of PhD. The first one, is just 21 months when we'd the second one. Two weeks after deliver, I have to be in class and it was winter. Just imagine how many layer of clothes I should put on?? Alhamdulillah, with hubby support and help, we manage everything well. Of course, along the PhD journey there's a lot of obstacles we've to face, especially when we're abroad. Don't give up! Is one of the key to success. We only have 24 hours a day, so be wise & smart how to manage your time. All the best Hana!
p/s I think my two little kids have push my spirit & give momentum to finish my PhD on time.
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